Boyshorts
by withoutmarbles
Summary: Bella discovers why exactly it is that Alice is leaving Rosalie's room half-naked at three o'clock in the morning.


**boyshorts**

* * *

The first few times Bella had spent the night at the Cullens', the others hadn't been around.

It had been just as well for her — she hadn't been particularly keen on sleeping in a houseful of vampires whom she knew could hear every word her unconscious self muttered. It had taken a rather lot of coaxing for Edward to convince her that of course none of them would be listening, and, if they happened to hear anything, they would certainly have heard stupider things in their time.

For the most part, her 'sleepover', as her father believed it to be, had gone well. Alice had appeared briefly after dinner to insist upon doing Bella's nails in traditional slumber party fashion, and Emmett had stopped by to tease his brother, but, for most of the evening, the Cullens had been scarce. Bella thought she had seen the haughty — and more than slightly intimidating — Rosalie a grand total of once, and that was just for the last few minutes of Alice's pedicure.

That alone had taken about a hundred pounds of stress off Bella's shoulders. Most of the Cullens did their best to make her feel welcome. Rosalie, not so much. She always felt as though she was intruding when Rosalie was in the room.

So, when the evening passed without incident, Bella was grateful. She got to cuddle up into Edward's chest and fall asleep without the worry of her father finding him and deciding that gun usage was the best solution, and Edward even agreed to let her fall asleep with _Pride and Prejudice _playing in the background, even though he personally wasn't an Austen fan. It was _nice._

Bella would have stayed warm and snuggly all night had it not been for the burning pain that decided to invite itself into her throat at three o'clock in the morning.

The strangled sound that came from her throat worried Edward more than it probably should have. They were going to need to have a talk about overprotectiveness. Preferably when her vocal chords weren't on fire.

"Bella? Are you all right?"

She sat up, rubbing one hand at her throat. "I just need a drink."

Edward was on his feet before she could even try to untangle herself from the sheets.

"I'll be right back."

"No — no, it's fine," Bella insisted. "My legs are sort of cramped anyways. I'll get it myself."

He looked a little puzzled at her rejection of the gesture, but he didn't argue, just stepped forwards and offered her a hand. Bella stumbled on his thick carpet, legs heavy with sleep, and he steadied her.

"I'm fine," she declared, marching out of the room with Edward's concerned gaze on her all the while.

It took Bella a second to orient herself once she had stepped out into the hallway. It was awfully dark — she supposed the Cullens didn't really need to have lights on at night. It was so easy to forget they were vampires.

She tiptoed the entire way down the hall before she realized that nobody would be sleeping. It was just as well, too, because she missed the first step down to the second floor and hit her shoulder against the railing, hard.

After that, she gave up on trying to be quiet.

Just as Bella's eyes began to adjust to the dark, a door to the left of the stairs — Rosalie and Emmett's room, if she was remembering correctly — opened and light spilled into the hallway, blinding her.

When her vision came back, Bella found herself looking at Alice. The smaller girl was wearing a pink shirt that was considerably too large for her, tied in a hasty knot above her hips, just high enough to expose the white trim of her boyshorts.

Bella's face heated up and she determinedly looked at Alice's face and not an inch lower.

"Oh, hey, Bella," Alice said, not seeming to notice the blush. "Can't sleep?"

"My, um- my throat hurts."

"I suppose you fit right in, then." She tilted her head. "Did you want a glass of water or something? I think Esme actually has Tylenol somewhere, if you need it."

"I was just heading down to the kitchen to get water, actually," Bella said, looking down awkwardly. Her eyes immediately snapped back up when she caught sight of Alice's bare legs.

Alice started down the hallway. "Well, let me know if you need anything."

Bella took a few steps towards the stairs before pausing. "Hey, Alice?"

"Mhmm?"

"Isn't that Rosalie and Emmett's room you just came out of?"

Alice turned back around to look at the other girl.

"Just Rosalie's," she corrected.

"Why…" Bella swallowed, working up her nerve. "Why are you coming out of Rosalie's room half-naked at three in the morning?"

Alice giggled. "Hasn't Edward told you?"

"Told me what?"

She opened her mouth to respond, but, before she could say anything, her eyes went blank. It took Bella a second to realize she must be having a vision. When she came to, Alice's face scrunched up in a frown.

"Really, Rose?" She addressed the question to the closed door. Bella could only hear silence, but she assumed the other vampire said something in response, because Alice's face smoothed and she nodded to herself.

Bella still hadn't quite gotten used to the way the Cullens communicated. There was the quietness and quickness of it; there was Edward with his mind-reading — that, at least, was straightforward; and then there was Alice, who could have an entire conversation without speaking to anyone. It was all a little overwhelming.

Catching sight of Bella's baffled expression, Alice laughed again.

"Sorry," she said, "but I think this is one explanation I'm going to leave to Edward."

"Why-"

"'Night, Bella!" And Alice flounced forwards, pecked Bella on the cheek, and disappeared down the hallway.

Bella thought she could still hear her giggling.

* * *

Edward did not look happy when Bella got back to his room.

For a moment, she thought he was upset with her for spilling water on her way back upstairs, but that would have hardly been fair; she had cleaned it up with extra care. She knew how Esme felt about her floors.

Bella decided not to ask. He'd talk if he really needed to.

"I ran into your sister," she said as she crawled back into bed.

"Yes — I heard." Edward's voice was tight.

Oh. Maybe that's what he was upset about.

"She said you could explain…" Bella trailed off.

"Her lack of propriety astounds me," he said, moving to pinch the bridge of his nose. "I expect this sort of behaviour from Rosalie, not Alice."

She watched him for a while, waiting for him to continue, but Edward seemed entirely lost in his own irritation.

"That's not an explanation," Bella pointed out.

He dropped his hand and took a deep breath. "What exactly do you want me to explain?"

"You said you heard the conversation."

"That's right. I did." Edward sighed. It took him a long moment to make himself talk. "Alice… spends most of her nights in Rosalie's room. What time she leaves, three o'clock in the morning or otherwise, is really quite irrelevant."

"Well, it's nice that they get along," Bella said. At least Rosalie liked _someone_. "But that's doesn't explain why she was, you know…" _Hardly wearing any clothes?_

Edward looked, Bella thought, rather like he wanted to melt through the floor. "Do I really have to answer that?" She just stared at him until he groaned and ran a hand through his already-tussled hair. And then, "My sister has an aversion to re-dressing herself."

"What?"

"Once a day's clothes are off, they're off, according to Alice."

Bella got the sense he was leaving something important out. "But why…?"

"You're really going to wring this out of me, aren't you?" Edward was practically whining. She'd never seen him look so distressed, and that was saying something.

"Um, yes."

Another deep breath.

"Alice and Rosalie are… _involved.__"_

_Lightbulb. _

Bella decided to toy with him.

"Involved?" she asked innocently. "How so?"

Edward gritted his teeth. "Let's just say that- well, let's just say that when Alice's clothes are off for the day, so are Rosalie's."

Laughter echoed up the stairs. It was unfamiliar to Bella — she assumed it had to belong to Rosalie. She herself was only just barely keeping from giggling at her boyfriend's discomfort.

"So — what, are they putting together a wardrobe? Putting on a… privatefashion show?"

More laughter. Higher, this time. Alice.

Edward looked positively mortified, enough so that Bella decided to let him off the hook.

"Oh!" she exclaimed, faking an epiphany. "You meant they're sleeping together."

He nodded so quickly his movements blurred.

Bella thought for a moment. If Alice and Rosalie were sleeping together, then- "What about Emmett and Jasper?"

Edward's embarrassment gave way to exasperation as he rolled his eyes. "Are you sure you want to hear it?"

"Positive."

He ran a hand through his hair again. "I suppose the easiest thing to explain is that Alice and Jasper were never in a romantic relationship. They are intensely, intimately platonic. They're perfect for each other — but Alice's, ah, preferences lie elsewhere. She loves him deeply, of course, so much that it often seems like they're mates."

"But they're not?" Bella asked, her eyebrows raised. Alice and Jasper had, out of all the Cullen pairs, always seemed the closest.

"Soulmates, maybe, if you believe in such things," Edward said, "but no. They play at being in a relationship in high school for simplicity's sake."

"And Rosalie and Emmett — are they like that, too?"

He snorted. "Oh, no. Rosalie and Emmett have been married before, several times, and they have absolutely no qualms about touching each other — although, that has been less frequent as of late. They were in love."

"'Were'?"

"Rosalie has since learned not to equate… _physicality_ with emotional attachment. Emmett understands, for which I am grateful, because _I _certainly don't." Edward shook his head sharply, like he could force things into perspective. "Confusion aside, they're all quite happy. And that, as I have been reminded countless times, is what matters."

Bella flopped onto her back, snuggling into the pillows. "Well, I think they make a cute couple."

He leaned over her and kissed the tip of her nose.

"Not as cute as us, love."

* * *

The next morning, the Cullen household was different.

Not the house itself — that was the same. Bella could do weird, but she didn't think she could have handled an interior overhaul while she slept. She already wasn't a morning person; she didn't need the added strain of trying to relearn the layout of the manor.

No, it was the Cullens themselves. Every single one of them seemed just a tad bit more relaxed, Edward included. He even let her eat breakfast by herself while he hopped in the shower.

Baby steps.

Halfway through breakfast, Alice bounced up to the counter and settled herself on a stool next to Bella.

"So, you think we're cute, huh?"

Before Bella could respond — _yes, of course, have you seen yourselves _— Rosalie appeared in the doorway. "She's not blind, Alice."

"Gosh, you're humble this morning."

"False modesty is not an attractive quality."

Alice stuck her tongue out. Rosalie just rolled her eyes.

Well, that was comforting, Bella thought. The blonde even disdained her own… well, whatever Alice was to her. Partner? Girlfriend? Friend with benefits?

After a moment of silence, Alice asked, "Do you want something, Rose?"

Rosalie pushed off the doorframe. "I'm taking Jasper to that car show in Seattle while you play with Edward's pet. I came to say goodbye."

Bella pressed her lips together and felt her face go red at being called a 'pet'. Alice didn't seem to take kindly to this, either, because she scowled.

"Bella is my _friend,__" _she said, arms crossed. "I'm not talking to you if you're going to be a brat."

Annoyance sparked in Rosalie's eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it came. With her expression clear, she turned to Bella.

"I apologize. It's nothing personal."

The blonde stared at her expectantly.

"Oh, um, that's okay, Rosalie," Bella managed to say, feeling slightly queasy under her gaze.

Alice's enthusiasm made up for it. She beamed. "See? Apologizing isn't so hard."

"Whatever you say." Rosalie rolled her eyes again, but there was fondness there. "Seriously, though, I do have to go. Jasper was already having a conniption fit about being late, and that was five minutes ago."

At that, Alice was across the room, wrapping her arms around the taller girl's neck to bring her face down to her level. She pecked Rosalie's forehead, nose, and both cheeks before placing a lingering kiss on her lips.

Before she released her, Alice put her lips to Rosalie's ear and whispered something.

Bella could have sworn Rosalie's eyes were a shade darker when she straightened.

It occurred to her then that she had never seen Alice and Rosalie so much as touch before that morning. They always seemed so distant at school. Even the night before, they had been carefully apart while Alice chattered at Bella, even while Rosalie hung around — waiting for Alice, probably. The thought of their separation compared to the easiness of their banter now seemed horribly wrong.

"Bye!" Alice chirped, bouncing back. "Have fun."

"I'll do my best." Rosalie stopped abruptly halfway out the room. "Oh — goodbye to you, too, I suppose, Bella."

Alice nodded approvingly, and Rosalie was gone.

"Good girl."


End file.
